The Trials, Victories & Adventures of Los PaulOS

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. ~ 1 John 4:18

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Of Weddings & Obligations

A random thought of the day.. just thinking about blog entries..

At the rate weddings are going, I realise we spend a lot on our weddings to make it a celebration to remember. And like on Mix FM a month or so ago, we heard that ppl do spend a bomb on weddings, get into debt to pay for the wedding and even sell drugs to pay for the wedding.

What have we gotten into, with Bridal Boutiques, Packages and Hotels with their exorbitant packages. You can't really get a hotel package for less than RM80/table nowadays. Don't get me started on the food. It's mass produced, and the taste may not be so great. Plus.. in my opinion.. I really wonder what's with all this food presentation? I don't get it.. swords, new age music, carrying a gal on the sedan-chair, with the food.

Whatever happened to a meaningful wedding of good celebration, making time for one another and good music, instead its been replaced with worry about collecting ang-pows to make enough for the payment, clothes changing, booze, yam-seng-ing (cheers) at each table trying to make the groom/bride drunk, and the list goes on.

I must say what I like about weddings is the celebration of the couple, and not bankrupting the couple. Yes everyone has to make money, but at what cost?

Given that I do participate in weddings quite a lot from Worship leading, to sound mixing, to playing with the band at the wedding dinner, Emceeing, etc... I just wish that it were not that expensive these days.

Having said that as Bride & Groom attitude, I think it's good to set your own expectations prior to weddings.. (From my own wedding I've come up with my opinion actually)
1. Set the budget "This is how much we'll spend and can give allowance for 10% more)
2. Don't expect to receive ang-pows, it'll add stress to you.
3. Be willing to sacrifice certains wants to meet your budget
4. Don't let ppl dictate or entice you for extras
5. Invest in people many years before weddings, it comes around with great friends who help wonderfully.
6. There is no "standard" rate for giving ang-pows to helpers, decide in your heart how much you can afford.
7. Let the main thing be the main thing.. God's Presence, your wedding ceremony that will speak of His greatness, goodness and blessings, appreciation of important ppl and what you exude on that day is important (Joy, Gratitude, Happiness, Love) ..

no one wants to see a sourpuss bride and/or groom on that day. (as ppl have said I am a sourpuss at times)

It rained at our wedding dinner.. but we thank God that He spoke through a pastor friend who said "It doesn't matter what happens, as long as you both know you got married.. that's all that matters"

Having said that I want to continue to apologise to all who came for our wedding dinner and didn't get to eat much because the caterers couldn't cope with the rain and have any other plans. But it was the best we could do under the cirmcustances.

Well I guess that's all I have to say for now.. Take care & God Bless



  • At August 08, 2009 12:38 AM, Blogger Timosiow said…

    Hey brother! Hahahha, how quaint. Been reading up a bit on that recently, about the cost of weddings. I thought I'd be prepared before anything happens.

    I'd love to have one in the future that's kept within reasonable budget, but I also know sometimes various factors and circumstances might drive it up. So I guess it's best to start saving now to make allowance for it. I do not believe in dream weddings where you spend the rest of your life paying off. What about the children?!? Lol.

    I feel ya bro, I feel ya.

  • At August 12, 2009 10:54 AM, Blogger PaulOS said…

    I can only atest to God's greatness on how my wife & i could afford our wedding. I was in debt until 2006. Managed to save only in 2 years on 2 small salaries to be able afford the wedding we felt was great.

    pix here

  • At August 21, 2009 12:46 PM, Blogger Oli - Stilling Your Moments - said…

    Great post Paul. My thoughts exactly!


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